Create a deep and loving connection to each other
“Love” Sculpture by Alexander Milov
“Attachment and the emotions associated with it are the core defining feature of close relationships; it is the ‘heart of the matter’”
- Sue Johnson, The Practice of Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy, pg. 25
You have had the same conversations again and again with no resolution.
You argue in circles, with both of you being angry at each other or avoiding each other.
You are often out of sync about when to have tough conversations, so you never have them.
One or both of you is unhappy but you don’t know how to articulate it productively to your partner.
You would like to be more authentic and to share how you really feel with your partner but you are afraid to hurt their feelings.
Relationships can become stuck in painful repetitive patterns and emotional disconnection
You need a guidebook to help you to learn how to build connection and intimacy
The only guidebook we have for developing our communication style comes from our family of origin.
How you experienced relationships, the giving and receiving of love and sharing your emotions, begins with our earliest family examples.
If your original family didn’t provide you with an healthy model for communication and for resolving conflicts then you may be in the dark about how to relate to your partner.
I can help you to understand how you got here, based upon your original patterns of relating, and to create a new guidebook which can enable the two of you to connect in a deep, authentic and securely attached way.
You can develop an understanding of what it takes to have a strong attachment
The good news is you can learn the skills needed to be able to have effective and meaningful communication and to build your emotional connection and intimacy towards one another.
With the proper conditions that are created in counseling you can learn to…
Regulate your body and emotions so you can communicate effectively.
Establish safety so you can share how you authentically feel.
Learn how to approach conflict without worrying that you might hurt each other’s feelings.
Gain a better understanding of your own patterns of behavior and how to act differently with you partner.
Share your vulnerability and your authentic Self with each other.
I can help you to create the conditions to build emotional intimacy
Throughout my experience working with couples, I have seen how being able to share your emotional experience with your partner lies at the heart of love and connection.
Not only does it create a solid foundation to weather the bigger issues, but it allows for the day-to-day to be navigated with more patience and ease.
To be able to connect emotionally you need to have the proper conditions so you can feel safe and secure with your partner.
I can help you to learn how to create these conditions so you can gain insight into each other’s inner world, and build compassion for each other, so you can be connected at a deeper and more attuned level.
I strive to provide a supportive and accepting safe place for both of you to be able to share what you need in order to heal.
I work in a variety of ways and pull from different tools in my toolkit, including:
Exploring attachment styles
Incorporating family-of-origin dynamics
Utilizing an emotionally-focused approach
Integrating somatics and noticing body sensations to build emotional awareness and support processing
Being mindful of how someone’s trauma history affects their relationship